Life Goes On

Abuse, life trauma and any event that causes stress, has the ability to veer us away from our normal state of health. Self help books, therapy,friendship can all be over-rated if not taken seriously and to heart. NOTHING, and I do mean NOTHING will work if one does not commit to change. One must commit to starting a new path, and trying different avenues of mental health.

Relationships, love,and commitment are NOT over- rated however the small stuff the everyday mini-crisis can get blown out of proportion. It  is frequently distorted, embellished and made more in our minds than what it really is. IF THIS BEHAVIOR BECOMES RECURRENT ,THEN IT NEEDS TO BE REALLY LOOKED AT SERIOUSLY. Someone in the relationship is not willing to make changes. Everyone in all relationships, friendships of the same sex,lovers, best friends,and work relationships ALL have to make sacrifices for the relationship to work.

Effective communication, and really hearing what the other party is saying is so very very crucial. Be with someone one hundred percent. The sun continues to rise, the clocking in of the daily grind continues, and the mundane reality shows continue to fill the television screen, taking us away from the importance of our relationships.

No matter the crisis, no matter the severity, no matter how much we beat ourselves up life goes on. Trivial ? Yes. However that is my point. In the scheme of life,  children are dying of leukemia,there are innocent victims of all types of abuse, racism and atrocities, why should we become overwhelmed with the minor stresses. We must all look at our life’s in perspective of the BIG PICTURE.

When we become so devastated by stress that we do not take care of ourselves or our loved ones we are selfish. By the very nature of our self pity we become selfish, only focused on us and what we could of done different. I have argued this point many times and have been applauded by the accuracy. Selfish behavior is not just the materialistic wants. It is also the emotional greed, the sucking away from others that will give. Individuals that are mired within their own emotional baggage will suck every one around them dry. Recognize there are those around you that want to help, stop the negative trends, and embellish the positive. Stop presenting yourself like a pseudo-Nancy Grace filling hearts with fear and intrigue just for ratings.

Personally I take solace in nature. Some individuals need to go on buying sprees. They fill their lives with materialistic objects as a substitute for depressive vacancy in their soul. Others, verbally abuse others, giving them a false sense of power and control, and still others avoid not addressing the issues hoping time will miraculously make them disappear. I seek out nature. It works for me. I will frequently go back to “Walden” by Thoreau. This grounds me and refocuses me on what is truly important for me to look at.

Trust is developed, through time and patience. When that is broken, not shared or withheld then the relationship breaks. How can two people ever get close when there is not TRUST.

Life will go on, hearts will be broken. Hopefully hearts will flourish, but it takes work,and commitment. The pay off can be HUGE. It just depends on if the couple wants it bad enough. It will not work when one wants it more than the other.

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